A for arthritis,
B for bad back,
C is for chest pains. Perhaps cardiac?
D is for dental decay and decline,
E is for eyesight–can’t read that top line.
F is for fissures and fluid retention
G is for gas (which I’d rather not mention)
H high blood pressure [I’d rather have low)
I for incisions with scars you can show.
J is for joints, that now fail to flex
K is for my knees that crack when they’re bent (Please forgive me, my Memory ain’t worth a cent)
L for libido–what happened to sex?
M is for Metamusil
N for neurosis, pinched nerves and stiff neck
O is for osteo – and all bones that crack
P for prescriptions, I have quite a few Give me another pill; I’ll be good as new!
Q is for queasiness. Fatal or flu?
R is for reflux–one meal turns into two
S is for sleepless nights, counting my fears
T for tinnitus–I hear bells in my ears
U is for urinary: difficulties with flow
V is for vertigo, that’s “dizzy”, you know.
W is worry, now what’s going ’round?
X is for X ray–and what might be found.
Y for another year I’ve left behind
Z is for zest that I still have my mind,
Have survived all the symptoms my body’s deployed,
And kept twenty-six doctors gainfully employed!!!

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